The Joys of Journaling

Journaling

I am addicted. I’ve tried quitting but to no avail. Walk with me past any stationary store, listen carefully, and you will hear the blank journals begin to call my name. “Kim, touch me, smell me, open me, write in me and I will change your life.” Eventually, I succumb to their siren call and indeed, they do change my life.

I love journaling. I love the soft leather cover, the parchment pages blank with potential, and the sound of my pen scratching out thoughts I never knew I had. I can cry in my journal, laugh, plan, promise, and confess – I can bleed from the inside out in shades of hot pink and in the end, it feels good.

Journaling changes me. I begin confused and end advised, start sad and finish glad, feel weak and emerge strong. God meets me in-between each ruled line and through journaling, true transformation occurs.

Blogging

My private journaling ended many months ago so that blogging could begin. I like blogging – it’s fast, it’s colorful, and it invites accountability. But, I realized this week, I may like blogging but I love journaling. Journaling reaches places in me where only God dare go.

So, it is with great sadness that I am taking a personal blogging break from the Christ-Saturated Life – perhaps permanently, to return to joyous journaling. I will continue my professional blog, geared to encourage Christian women in their walk with Jesus and I hope you will visit me at: http://christiancoachingforlife.blogspot.com/

I Will Miss You

In the meantime, thank you for so faithfully exploring the Christ-saturated life with me this past year. You are in my prayers.

An Open Letter to Jesus

Precious Christ of God,

You are the love of my life. You have captured my heart, captivated my mind, and consumed my affections. My deepest longing is to love You more.

Jesus, You amaze me – my Sovereign Savior, Redeeming Deliverer, Christ of God. How is it that You, the Eternal One entered time:

• Creator becoming creation,
• Spirit clothing Himself in human skin,
• Breath of life – breathing,
• Immutability taking shape,
• Love crucified.

The unimaginable has occurred. You chose the path of death so that I could have eternal life. Why did the Almighty God, who is everything and needs nothing, die to make Kim His friend? There is no greater love than this.

I am…

• filled with Your presence,
• bathed in Your love,
• and sit in high places.

You will…

• guard me,
• protect me,
• counsel me,
• and fix Your eye upon me.

You have…

• called me,
• named me,
• forgiven me,
• and stamped Your image in my heart.

You continually…

• desire me,
• yearn for me,
• reveal Yourself to me,
• and delight in me.

You take my breath away!

A simple thank you is but a trite expression coming from a wandering heart, yet today I bow my heart and life in worship before you - my God and my friend.

Your grateful child,

Kim

A Spiritual High

Junior Meteorologist

As the hurricane season continues its assault on the Gulf States, I’ve become an avid watcher of the weather channel. Jim Cantore’s live reports fill my home and severe weather expert, Dr. Steve Lyons, is my new best friend.

As a meteorologist wanna-be, I’ve become quite the student of the hourly weather map. Words like low pressure system, cold front, and wind shear fall from my lips and awe my family as we linger over our morning coffee. But there is one weather word that I’ve embraced more than all the others – ‘high.’

This past month as storms threaten, I sigh with relief each time the weather man reports that ‘the high’ remains over peninsular Florida. I’ve yet to truly comprehend what ‘the high’ is, but this I know, it acts as an invisible force field pushing away each storm as it threatens to come near. For weeks, ‘the high’ has been faithfully guarding Florida’s homes, protecting our lives, and ensuring our safety. High is good.

Spiritual Climate Control

Longingly, I’ve been yearning for that same ‘high’ in my spiritual life. What if as the wind and the waves of life began crashing on my shore there was an invisible spiritual high that pushed their devastation away? What if I were so filled with the presence of the Holy Spirit that discouragement, despair, envy, jealousy, and cynicism had no choice but to pass me by? A spiritual high would be very good.

This week I plan to practice a bit of climate control. By God’s grace, every morning I will wring out self from the sponge of my heart. Still and empty before the Lord, through worship, listening prayer, and meditation on Scripture, I will be filled with Him. Thus with God’s help, I will create my own an invincible ‘spiritual high.’

Hurricanes

Literal Hurricanes

It’s hurricane season here in sunny Florida and I don’t like it. Gustav has emptied New Orleans, Hannah is pouring in the Carolina’s, and Ike is barreling down on my beloved state.

I can’t control hurricanes. I can worry, sweat, complain, and whine, but nothing Kim Avery can do changes the course of a storm. I really don’t like that.

During hurricane season there is only one thing I can do. Stay tuned. I can listen to radio updates, follow the hurricane tracker, and lock in the weather channel on my remote control. And it helps to be informed. I know what to buy, where to shop, when to run, and when to hide. I can’t stop a storm but with helpful information, I can ride it out safely.

Emotional Hurricanes

Emotional hurricanes often blow into my life as well. Trials sap my joy, strained relationships pour sorrow into my heart, and economic downturns cause us all to batten down the hatches.

I can’t control emotional hurricanes either. I can worry, sweat, complain, and whine, but nothing Kim Avery can do changes the course of a storm. Need I mention - I don’t like that?

But when hurricanes blow into my life there is much I can do. I can tune into my Maker and listen to Him. He will tell me what to say, where to go, and how to prepare. Most of all, He will reassure me of His love and fill me with His peace.

I can’t stop the storms of life but with my God, I have all I need.

Live Simply. Love Generously. Leave the Rest to God.

A Remarkable Life

The Herald Sun recently recorded this remarkable testament as found amidst the papers of a martyred African pastor.

“I’m a part of the fellowship of the unashamed. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has been made. I’m a disciple of His and I won’t look back, let up, slow down, back away or be still.

My past is redeemed. My present makes sense. My future is secure. I’m done and finished with low living, sight walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed visions, mundane talking, cheap living and dwarfed goals.

I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position, promotions, plaudits, or popularity. I don’t have to be right, or first, or tops, or recognized, or praised, or rewarded. I live by faith, lean on His presence, walk by patience, lift by prayer and labor by Holy Spirit power.

My face is set. My gait is fast. My goal is heaven. My road may be narrow, my way rough, my companions few, but my guide is reliable and my mission is clear. I will not be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, turned back, deluded or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice or hesitate in the presence of the adversary. I will not negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder at the pool of popularity or meander in the maze of mediocrity.

I won’t give up, shut up, or let up until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up and preached up for the cause of Christ. I am a disciple of Jesus. I must give until I drop, preach all I know and work until He comes. And when He does come for His own, He’ll have no problems recognizing me. My colors will be clear!”

A Remarkable Death

Wow – what can I add to that except say a big ‘Amen” by living my life the way he faced his death. How about you?

The Happy God

God is happy. I Timothy 1:11 states it with deep Biblical propositions saying this: “The gospel of the glory of the blessed God.” Huh? Pastor John Piper helps me understand it by paraphrasing it this way: “The good news of the glory of the happy God.” The happy God, I like that!

I treasure knowing that my God is joy-filled, eternally, and irrepressibly happy. When He looks out at the world He isn’t discouraged, dismayed, or depressed – in fact, He is happy beyond belief.

I’m not always happy. I watch the news and I stew. I watch the economic downturn and I worry. I watch my children grow up and I chew my fingernails to the quick. No, I’m not always happy. Shame on me.

God knows all things – and He’s not worried. God controls all things and He lives in peace. God sees the beginning from the end and He smiles in delight.

It is this happy God that surrounds and envelopes me with His presence. And it is His Spirit that lives in me, filling me with abundance. Thus, I can declare with the Psalmist: “In Thy presence is fullness of joy.” (Psalm 16:11).

In Matthew 25:23 Jesus invites me to dwell in joy with Him by saying, “Enter into the joy of your master.” And today, I think I will. Won’t you join me today in enjoying our happy God?

Tagged

Hi - I've been tagged by HisFireFly:
I’m supposed to share an Alphabet story, the A to Z 's of me.


Attached or Single? Attached forever to my dear hubby, Ron.


Best Friend? My best friend without a doubt is Jesus Christ. He is EVERYTHING!

Cake or Pie? French Silk Pie.

Day of Choice? Monday – it’s a fresh start, each new week.

Essential Item? Computer. I love the way it connects me with the world.


Flavor of Ice cream? Mint Chocolate Chip – anyone else?


Gummy Bears or Worms? Can I say, yuck? Both are too sticky for me.


Hometown? Chicago suburbs


Indulgences? Hot Fudge Sundae – it can cure just about anything.


January or July? I live in Florida, definitely January. It’s paradise.


Kids? Two fabulous children.


Last Movie I saw in a Theater? Two weeks ago – Batman Returns – very intense.


Middle Name? Lynn


Number of Siblings? 2 – An older sister and a younger brother.


Oranges or Apples? Apples, crisp.


Phobia or Fear? Fear – spiders.


Quote? “I saw more clearly than ever, that the first great and primary business to which I ought to attend every day was to have my soul happy in the Lord.” George Mueller


Reason to Smile? Jesus loves me!


Season? Fall – I love the cacophony of color in the fall leaves.


Tag two more: Susan at http://www.thethirstysoul.blogspot.com/, Heather at the strivingwife,

Unknown Fact About Me? I used to play the oboe in the school band.


Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals? I am a two month old vegetarian.


Worst Habit? Diet Cola


X-rays or Ultrasounds? Ultrasound – it brings back cool pictures.


Your favorite Food? Pizza, deep dish, Chicago style


Zoo I love? Brooklyn Zoo in Chicago

So there you have it, a snapshot of me, written quickly, A to Z.

The Missi_g Key

“N” is Missi_g

My computer lost its “n” key this week. I just woke up o_e day a_d it was go_e. It did_’t seem like a big deal at the time. So, who _eeds the letter “n” a_yway? A_d if worse came to worse, if I a_gled my fi_ger_ail just so a_d tapped just right, the _eeded “n” would magically appear. A_d if _ot, there are 25 other letters i_ the alphabet that I ca_ use.

Oh my, do you k_ow how ma_y words have the letter “n” i_ them? I’ve typed more tha_ 20 of them i_ just these few se_te_ces. Sure, I ca_ live my life goi_g through awkward co_tortio_s to hit the missi_g “n”, a_d I ca_ brai_storm u_ique replaceme_ts so that I _ever use a_ “n” word agai_ – but it’s i_efficie_t a_d discouragi_g.

“N” is Back

Well – I don’t know if you can tell but my “n” key is back. Yeah! But all this “n-less” living has led me to consider the beauty of the body of Christ. God wisely gifted each member with unique strengths and then placed them perfectly in a Christian community. Each one is important, each irreplaceable.

Are You Missing In Action?

And so, when one believer in the body is missing, we all suffer. Sure, we can awkwardly try to fill in for the missing member, but it is time-consuming and inadequate. Or, we could try to overlook the gap and find alternate solutions but it is never quite the same.

I’m not sure what letter I am in God’s keyboard of life, probably an “x” or “q.” But this week I learned that whatever part I play – it is important and irreplaceable. I saw first hand what happens when I don’t show up and do my part.

This week I hope you will join me in whole-hearted service so together we can unite for the glory of God.

I Love My City

I love my city. I know it seems strange to love a city. People generally love family, friends, the opposite sex, and of course a steaming hot, deep-dish Chicago style pizza. But I woke up this morning thinking about how much I love Winter Haven, FL.

I don’t love it because it is the cutest, the cleanest, or the most caring, although it is. I don’t love it because of the Chicago style pizza because it doesn’t have any. I love Winter Haven because Jesus does.

Jesus Loves Cities

In Luke 19, we see that Jesus loves cities. “When He approached Jerusalem, He saw the city and wept over it…” Jerusalem, the City of David, was the crown jewel of Israel. Jesus loved it. It was lost. Jesus wept.

Jesus doesn’t weep often. When He does, I pay attention. What do I learn? Cities are important because people are important.

People in Cities Need Jesus

My city, Winter Haven has some wonderful points. There are beautiful lakes, serene pastures, and some great revitalization going on downtown. But like Jerusalem, and New York, and Chicago, and Hoboken - much of it is lost. Dads have deserted their homes. Moms are neglecting their kids. Students roam the streets and drugs pillage the schools. Like every town and city in our great country, Winter Haven needs Jesus.

God Reaches Cities Through Us

That’s why I am so thankful that God has given me, along with thousands of others, a heart, and the means to make a difference. Through efforts large and small, performed in many venues, hidden and unheralded by men – God is working through us.

My small part? This week the LifeRenewal Ministries team, (www.LifeRenewalMinistries.com) on which I am privileged to serve, began gearing up to throw our small rock in Winter Haven’s pond of need. Our God-sized goal is for the every woman in Winter Haven to ‘Experience Transformation through Knowing Jesus.’ Our almost invisible venue is two weekly studies each Thursday.

Our vision is large. Our effect is small. But our faith is unshakeable. God loves our city. So do I. Pray with me that this fall His love will shine brightly and effectively here locally for all to see.

My Father Knows

“Therefore do not be like them.
For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him.”

Matthew 6:8

Even before I call on Him, my Father knows what I need. And the answer is already on the way (Is. 65:24). Yes, I am exhorted to pray for my daily needs, but in these verses I see that it involves so much more.

Prayer allows me to experience God more intimately.

As a child relies on the loving provision of his parent, he is more and more convinced of that parent’s unrelenting love. In the same way, my Father is eager for me to experience Him as He provides for me.

He knows me and always gives me what is best. I am feeling His love. Among other things this week, my Father specifically gave me:

• A husband who adores me
• Friends that support me
• A daughter to encourage me
• A son who misses me
• A God who knows me and supplies my every need

I am blessed. The days weren’t always sunny or the nights trouble-free. But I have a heavenly Father who moves heaven and earth every single day just so that I will know Him, feel Him, talk to Him, and love Him. Prayer exists so that I can experience my God. It works!

Christmas in July

Christmas, Already?

I love the holidays. The golden turkey rightly enthroned, vacuum-clogging tinsel covering the floor, gifts scattered artfully under the tree - I love it all. In fact, if you listen closely you can catch me humming, “Hark, the Herald…” twelve months out of twelve. Christmas is my favorite time of year.

And yes, I have looked at the calendar recently. It is still July. With its searing heat, soaking humidity, and summer rains, December seems a long way off. Yet, as I reel from life’s ups and downs these past few weeks, my mind and heart can’t help but turn to Christmas - especially my favorite one, the Christmas that began all Christmases, that very first one.

To Kim, With Love

That year, in a humble stable, there were a myriad of gifts under God’s tree. Incredibly, some even bore my name. To: Kim, with love, From God. And over the years, I’ve eagerly torn open each one, discarded the manger-brown wrapping, and treasured them all.

God gives the best gifts, doesn’t He? They are the kind of gifts that keep on giving and giving. But the particular precious present I’ve hugged to myself throughout this shadowy week is that supreme gift, the gift of God, Emmanuel. God with us. God with Kim. Nothing could have ministered to me more.

God With Us

• When I wake up at 3:00 am, worries racing though my mind – He’s there.
• When I wake again, give in and get up, at 4:00 a.m. His smile lights my day.
• I read His Word; He speaks. It is good.
• As I work, He whispers His words of wisdom.
• As I seek to love, He loves through me.
• At last, I collapse in sleep and He sings songs over me in the night.
• Weary, the clock again read 3:00 a.m. He has not moved.
• Today, I will do it all again, but I am not alone.

Emmanuel – God with Kim. It’s the perfect gift, and I love it.

Merry Christmas.

Life is Hard

• It’s been a hard week at our house. You know the kind I mean, when your breath barely escapes and your heart threatens to break. One of those weeks, the kind of week that may indeed stretch into forever. Life is hard at times.
  
  I am so thankful to be able to say that my pervasive thought through the fear and through the tears is this: God is so good.

• God is good because He loves me enough to grow me through pain.
• He is good because He does what is best for me even when I disagree.
• He is good because all my life He has prepared me for this trial… and the next...and the next…
• God is good because He always provides even in the pain:
  
  through His love
  through His Word
  through friends
  through family
  through laughter
  through tears

So today, life is hard but God is good. Thus, my heart can’t help but sing:

Blessed Be Your Name

Blessed be Your name in the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name
And blessed be Your name when I’m found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be your name

Every blessing You pour out I’ll turn back to praise
And when the darkness closes in Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name when the sun’s shining down on me
When the world’s “all as it should be”
Blessed be Your name
And blessed be Your name on the road marked with suffering
Though there’s pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

You give and take away You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

God is good. He is my foundation, my treasure, my wisdom, my comfort, and amazingly, He is my friend. He is everything.

Blessed be Your name, O Lord.

Cruising

Trivia Question: If you fill a hole, 1 ft. x 2 ft. x 3 ft. with dirt, how big is that hole? You will be happy to know that during trivia night on our Royal Caribbean Cruise, the Avery Family Team scored big with their correct answer of “0” (because once you fill a hole with dirt there is no more hole.) Unfortunately, we did not do as well on the others questions and missed out on the big prize – but the fun and laughter was worth the participation.

Needless to say, our cruise to Cozumel, Mexico was a big winner. John and Ron performed an amazing elephant dance. Bethany and I melted under a hot stone massage. Jonathan and his cousin Joey gorged themselves endlessly at the buffet and we all got to swim with the dolphins. From food, to family, to fun, cruising is definitely the life for me.

This week, I am thankful for God’s gracious seasons of life. While there is a time to work, there is also a time to play. This past week, my family got to play and we have returned rested, renewed, and reinvigorated. God is good.

The Year of Better Choices

I like to measure things. In fact, very few things in my life escape examination – how far can I run, how much do I weigh, how many have I done? So often, knowing how and where to improve will depend largely on how much progress I have made.

My sad realization however is this, some things just can’t be measured. The truly important attitudes and affections, such as my love for others, my heart towards God, and my spiritual journey with Christ, don’t line up well under the yardstick of my mind. Deep sigh. How will I ever grow and change if I can’t tell where I have been and what much further I have to go?

These pondering came to a head last month on my birthday. This annual event always provides an opportunity to evaluate my life in its most important areas. But alas, no adequate measurements or markers could be found.

Not so easily deterred from my relentless quest for more of Christ, I shifted my focus and the whole view changed. Instead of leaning forward towards definable results, I decided to look inward for a deeper obedience. I would concentrate on Christ in the tiniest of habits and trust Him to write my legacy. This year, the 365 days between one birthday and the next would be, “The Year of Better Choices.”

Whenever I face a decision, carrots or cake, compliance or complaint, others or self – with God’s help I will make the better choice. Scripture clearly promises that when I abide in Him, He will cause me to bear fruit. So, this year I will look less at the tree and more at the Gardener.

“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.”
II Corinthians 3:18

I made the determination. I have set up a journaling system. I even purchased and set up a countdown clock. Pray for me, only 322 days more to go.

Will the 'Real Kim', Please Stand Up?

This past month I finally relented and got new professional photos taken. Yuck. In all honesty, I would have preferred a root canal, but of course, I can’t exactly put that on the front of a brochure.

Why do I hate the whole photo thing? I think it’s because no matter how good or bad the shot, it never quite looks like me. In my optimistic mind’s eye, I am serene, tall, peaceful, and confident. In my wild daydreams, I look a lot like Angelina Jolie (hah!). But then I see an exact image of myself and reality hits. I just don’t like what I see.

Thankfully, God reminded me: I am not what I look like, I am not what others perceive me to be, and I am not what I do. I am who Christ has declared me to be.

• I am God’s child. (John 1:12)
• I am Christ’s friend. (John 15:15)
• I am entirely new. (II Cor. 5:17)
• I am a saint. (Eph. 1:1)
• I am complete in Christ. (Col. 2:10)
• I am a citizen of heaven. (Phil 3:20)
• I am God’s temple. (I Cor. 3:16)
• and more…

No matter who I appear to be, I am thankful today that I truly am who God has made me to be.

Remedy for Anxiety

With gas prices skyrocketing and the economy nose-diving, my daily anxiety level was definitely rising. Questions with no answers spun around endlessly in my mind. Would Jonathan find work? Should we be looking for a more economical car? Will my friend lose her job? Will the market crash? Is the world coming to an end? The noise in my head and the pit in my stomach just grew and grew.

And frankly, my prayers didn’t seem to be helping. “God, make more jobs. Stabilize the market. Fix the economy. Find more oil. Ease my way in this life.” But even as my praying increased, my anxiety did as well. What was wrong?

Then I remembered. What you feed grows, what you starve dies. I had been feeding my anxiety and it had become a mushroom cloud of doom that haunted me day and night. Each morning as I got ready for the day, I listened to the newscasters drone on and on in the background. In the evening before bed, I turned on the TV, tuning into the catastrophe of the day. No wonder my stomach hurt and my mind was reeling. It was time for a change.

This week as I got ready in the mornings, I played my mind and heart a different song. Praise music filled the room reminding me of my powerful God. He is bigger than the economy, wiser than the world’s leaders, truer than the market, and better than any earthly blessings. That sweet tune followed me throughout the day and sang over me in the night. God is on the throne. All is safe in His loving hands.

This week join me on my new diet. Feed faith – starve fear.

Accountability

Accountability, it’s something we all need but few seek. After all, who really wants the world peeking in the windows of their heart?

Bible study teacher and author, Nancy Leigh DeMoss, felt the same way but she chose to do something about it. Hit with the grim realization that the pace of her life had outraced the love of her life, Jesus, she courageously flung open the doors of her heart to the scrutiny and help of friends.

As I heard Nancy’s story on the radio, I was convicted to my very core. Pulling off to the side of the road, I listened, cried, repented, and scribbled some life-changing thoughts on the back of my crowded to-do list. What follows is a list of accountability questions I developed listening to Nancy that day.

Now, I have bravely typed, written, laminated, and passed out these questions to my friends. They have agreed to pray for me, inquire about each of these areas regularly, and lovingly hold my feet to the fire. I give you permission to do the same. I need all the help I can get.

Beyond that, for those fellow brave, desperate, Christ-seekers out there, feel free to use these questions to invite accountability in your life as well. And don’t forget to let me what questions I can ask you.

• How was your time with the Lord this morning?


• How’s your spirit? Are you uptight or anxious?


• Are you serving the Lord with gladness?


• Is your heart tender and responsive to the Lord?


• How are your spiritual and emotional gauges? What are you doing to refill them?


• Are there any areas that you have been teaching or sharing something that you’re not living?


• Is there anything that you’ve been doing or not doing that you would not want others to know?


• Are there any areas of your life that you are not obeying what you know God wants you to do?


• Is there anything you need to repent of?


• Has the pace of your life outraced the love of your life?

A Community of Christian Friends

“I Did It My Way”

Hiking is exhilarating. I love choosing the tallest mountain, picking the toughest trail, and scaling my way to the highest point. Mighty conqueror, I pause at the peak, recapture my breath, drink in the view, and throw both arms high in the air in a triumphant pose. Yes! I did it and I did it all by myself.

This is a great attitude for hiking but it sure gets me in trouble everywhere else. Surrounded by the sound waves of American self-sufficiency I all too easily hum Frank Sinatra’s old classic, “I Did It My Way.”

This is completely contrary to God’s design!

God Has a Different Way

Instead of isolated islands, God placed us in families, in relationships, in churches, and in community. He extols the virtues of sharing, submission, and sacrifice. He is right.

That’s why I was so thankful Thursday to restart the summer rhythm of meeting with my accountability group. It is a simple gathering born out of sheer desperation. Years ago, fearing my self-sufficient nature, I approached a handful of godly, gracious women. Women who would love me, support me, teach me, and keep me in line. I invited them into my world and eventually into my heart. They are my dear friends and more.

I’ll Do It His Way

So, as the calendar turned over to summer we began to meet again. Ninety simple minutes of getting reacquainted and reconnected - with each other, our goals, our callings, and our overwhelming love for Jesus. These women make the gospel come alive. They restore my sense of spiritual community and their authentic lives open my heart wider to the love of God.

Solo hiking may be an exhilarating afternoon excursion, but it is only in community that I experience real, daily Christian living. Thank you dear friends, for all that you are and do in my life. I am humbled by the privilege of walking this journey with you.

To the Graduate - An Open Letter to My Son

We smiled. Really, it was all that your father and I could do the first time we saw you. We just smiled. You were so precious, so tiny, so vulnerable, and best of all you were ours!

That first year flew by so quickly. You slept, you burped, you laughed, and you made us all smile. I have never seen a better baby in my whole life – at least until your feet hit the floor. Look out world. You crawled, you climbed, you scampered, and you escaped my tender grasp time and time again. But you never escaped my heart.

Your proud foray into the world of academia soon followed when at the age of two you stepped out of my car and into Hope Preschool. The world gasped but welcomed this delightful class clown with the beguiling eyes, and your ability to make others smile just grew and grew. And so did you. From Hope, to Calvary, to Grace Lutheran, Geneva, and then home again, the literal and academic years have sprouted wings and flown.

I have loved watching you go and grow, pure energy wrapped in skin. An accomplished drummer, a faithful student and a star athlete, our hearts nearly burst with pride. With incredible agility, you have tapped out a tune, graced the soccer fields, led the football team, and mastered the art of Tae Kwon Do. We have loved every minute of watching, listening, cheering, and screaming your name. You are truly amazing.

And now our baby boy has grown into a mature and wonderful man. Kind, compassionate, intense, and determined, you still make me smile. I love you with all my heart, dear son. And on this, your high school graduation day, I lift my eyes toward heaven above and thank our Father for the day He chose to make you ours.

Congratulations – and look out world, he’s only just begun!

Happy Birthday

To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven.
Ecclesiastes 3:1

Today is my birthday and I am thinking about aging. In all honesty, I’m also thinking about parties and putt-putt, polka dots presents and perennial friends, but today’s tick of the clock does point out that indeed, I am a year older.

The American culture doesn’t look kindly on aging. It pressures me to hide it, dye it, deny it, and fight it at all costs. A little liposuction here, a slight tightening with the knife over there, and a generous sprinkling of support garments everywhere all add to the illusion that youth is a treasure to be grasped forever. God disagrees.

A gray head is a crown of glory;
It is found in the way of righteousness.
Proverbs 16:31

We have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us…Though outwardly we are wasting away,

yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.
II Corinthians 4:7,16

Long life is a blessing. While one glance in the mirror shows that outwardly I am wasting away – inwardly I carry the treasure of God.

Against the cultural pull, God declares, a year older is a year newer. And this year, the plastic surgeon of my soul has been cutting away all that is not of Him. The temptation towards independence is being removed, the busyness increasingly stilled, and the importance of God seen clearer than ever before. He is the gift I most want to unwrap.

God has called the old, the wise, and the increasingly wizened to an important work. Even as the ice cream cake melts, I am to know Him and to show Him. The Psalmist puts it this way,

O God, You have taught me from my youth,
And I still declare Your wondrous deeds.
And even when I am old and gray, O God, do not forsake me,
Until I declare Your strength to this generation,
Your power to all who are to come.

Psalm 71:17-18

With smile lines showing, I joyfully declare, I am a year older today. I have a rich inheritance and a heavenly calling to pass it on. Hand me another piece of cake; it’s time to celebrate.

A Snake in my House

I woke up today and discovered a snake in my house. A snake. Okay, maybe it wasn’t exactly a cobra or a python and if I told you the length I’m sure you wouldn’t be impressed but please don’t miss the point. I woke up and there was a snake in my house.

Last night I went to bed blissfully secure in my usual nighttime preparations. The windows were shut; the doors were locked. Yet, somehow, while I slept this black, slimy, intruder slithered in uninvited and unwelcome.

Barefoot and ignorant, I awoke and stumbled towards my morning bottled water. That’s when I saw him. I’m not sure who was more surprised, my nemesis or me. Either way, it was not a happy moment. I decided I wasn’t as thirsty as I thought, quickly fled the scene, and left the water untouched.

I then thought about Satan, the original snake, in the original garden. Barefoot and blissfully unaware, one day Eve bumped into Satan as he stood between her and the fountain of living water. It was not a happy moment.

Satan often sneaks into my life when I’m not looking. Jealous thoughts, petty impatience, stubborn insistence on my own way – these are the back doors he frequently uses. Suddenly, there he stands, blocking the way between me and the fountain of living water, and all too often, I’m the one who has let him in.

Unfortunately, I’ve grown accustomed to Satan’s attacks over the years and rarely see them as the unwelcome, slimy intruders that they are. But I should. They stand between me and the Savior I love.

Today, I discovered a snake in my house. I took a long-handled shovel and put him out. Pray that when Satan shows up later, I will have the wisdom to do the same. There’s nothing I want more than to drink deeply from the fountain that is my Christ.

Transitions

Today will be better. I hope. It’s not that yesterday was bad but it didn’t take long for all my early morning intentions to fly out the window in a gusty morning breeze. I intended to pray more, love better, worship continually, and witness frequently. But when a strong storm of busyness blew through my day, those noble aspirations were literally gone with the wind.

So, this morning while praying and dreaming about my day, my intentions suddenly shaped themselves into a plan. A simple plan, literally just a 3x5 card. On this card, I reminded my forgetful self to stop and yield to Christ at each new shift in the day. My new and inexpensive memory system would now jog my memory and inform my prayer at every transition point.

Fueled for success, my card and I leapt into my bright red car and off I went. Unlike yesterday, today Jesus went with me. From the dry cleaners to the grocery store, from Staples to Chico’s, at each new point, I saw my card. I stopped, I yielded, and I lingered in His love.

Small transitional check-ins changed my day from Christ-deficient to Christ-saturated. Today really was better. I can’t wait to see what happens tomorrow.

Florence Littauer's Amazing Influence

Since 1970, legendary speaker and author Florence Littauer has bravely pioneered the path for Christian women speakers everywhere. From a humble home and an unchurched background, Florence never aspired to greatness. She simply wanted to reach hurting women. Thus, she began teaching small Bible studies in her home. But it wasn't long before God called her to take His message to a wider audience. Thirty books and millions of people later, Florence has touched the world.

Last week in Austin, Texas, I had the amazing privilege of being trained by this gentle giant. For three days, I sat under her teaching and she sat under mine – gulp. Why? Because although Florence could have taken those three days to make ten of thousands of dollars and added one more conference to her own resume, she chose instead to pour her wisdom and experience into the lives of 70 other Christian leaders.

Ten years into her speaking career, Florence faced a fork in the road. Down one path lay personal success and the accumulation of the world’s accolades. The other, more narrow path offered the possibility of kingdom influence. Florence chose influence. For over twenty years, she has dedicated herself to reproducing quality, godly Christian communicators who would share God’s good news.

I am blessed. I have watched, learned from, and been critiqued by this godly, talented woman. Florence Littauer has inspired me, not just to be the best speaker and author that I can be, but to more than that. She has reminded me that true success comes from influencing people who will influence people. Together, with God’s help, we can change the world.

Christ-Saturated. Irresistibly Attractive.

Christ-saturated and irresistibly attractive – these two hauntingly beautiful and seemingly unattainable descriptions came to me when I asked the Lord to describe the life I am to live. These ideals are lofty, lovely, and a far cry from the Kim I am today.

Christ-saturated - Every moment of every day, He wants to permeate and saturate my life. My words, my thoughts, my actions are to be soaked and dripping with Jesus. This is my deep desire but hardly my current reality.

Instead, on many mornings as I begin the day with Him, I pray, I meditate, and then carelessly meander through the day. Like a good cup of Starbucks, I use God to jump start the morning but fuel the rest of the day with a bottomless cup-of-Kim. “Forgive me, Jesus. Please be my all in all – all day, every day.”

Irresistibly attractive - This should be the outward result of my inner Christ-saturated life. When I drink deeply all day of the cup of Christ there is a rich reservoir to tap into as I seek to live a life of love.

I have a long way to go. Even today, my snippy voice, my impatiently drumming fingers, my visible life were not exactly a magnetic force drawing all to Him. “Lord, help me to be so full of You that Your love can’t help but spill out on all I meet.”

Christ-saturated. Irresistibly attractive. Don’t try to pick me out at the grocery store using only those descriptions, for I will not be found. But do join me in prayer, that these two phrases will more and more become the music of my life.