Will the 'Real Kim', Please Stand Up?

This past month I finally relented and got new professional photos taken. Yuck. In all honesty, I would have preferred a root canal, but of course, I can’t exactly put that on the front of a brochure.

Why do I hate the whole photo thing? I think it’s because no matter how good or bad the shot, it never quite looks like me. In my optimistic mind’s eye, I am serene, tall, peaceful, and confident. In my wild daydreams, I look a lot like Angelina Jolie (hah!). But then I see an exact image of myself and reality hits. I just don’t like what I see.

Thankfully, God reminded me: I am not what I look like, I am not what others perceive me to be, and I am not what I do. I am who Christ has declared me to be.

• I am God’s child. (John 1:12)
• I am Christ’s friend. (John 15:15)
• I am entirely new. (II Cor. 5:17)
• I am a saint. (Eph. 1:1)
• I am complete in Christ. (Col. 2:10)
• I am a citizen of heaven. (Phil 3:20)
• I am God’s temple. (I Cor. 3:16)
• and more…

No matter who I appear to be, I am thankful today that I truly am who God has made me to be.

Remedy for Anxiety

With gas prices skyrocketing and the economy nose-diving, my daily anxiety level was definitely rising. Questions with no answers spun around endlessly in my mind. Would Jonathan find work? Should we be looking for a more economical car? Will my friend lose her job? Will the market crash? Is the world coming to an end? The noise in my head and the pit in my stomach just grew and grew.

And frankly, my prayers didn’t seem to be helping. “God, make more jobs. Stabilize the market. Fix the economy. Find more oil. Ease my way in this life.” But even as my praying increased, my anxiety did as well. What was wrong?

Then I remembered. What you feed grows, what you starve dies. I had been feeding my anxiety and it had become a mushroom cloud of doom that haunted me day and night. Each morning as I got ready for the day, I listened to the newscasters drone on and on in the background. In the evening before bed, I turned on the TV, tuning into the catastrophe of the day. No wonder my stomach hurt and my mind was reeling. It was time for a change.

This week as I got ready in the mornings, I played my mind and heart a different song. Praise music filled the room reminding me of my powerful God. He is bigger than the economy, wiser than the world’s leaders, truer than the market, and better than any earthly blessings. That sweet tune followed me throughout the day and sang over me in the night. God is on the throne. All is safe in His loving hands.

This week join me on my new diet. Feed faith – starve fear.

Accountability

Accountability, it’s something we all need but few seek. After all, who really wants the world peeking in the windows of their heart?

Bible study teacher and author, Nancy Leigh DeMoss, felt the same way but she chose to do something about it. Hit with the grim realization that the pace of her life had outraced the love of her life, Jesus, she courageously flung open the doors of her heart to the scrutiny and help of friends.

As I heard Nancy’s story on the radio, I was convicted to my very core. Pulling off to the side of the road, I listened, cried, repented, and scribbled some life-changing thoughts on the back of my crowded to-do list. What follows is a list of accountability questions I developed listening to Nancy that day.

Now, I have bravely typed, written, laminated, and passed out these questions to my friends. They have agreed to pray for me, inquire about each of these areas regularly, and lovingly hold my feet to the fire. I give you permission to do the same. I need all the help I can get.

Beyond that, for those fellow brave, desperate, Christ-seekers out there, feel free to use these questions to invite accountability in your life as well. And don’t forget to let me what questions I can ask you.

• How was your time with the Lord this morning?


• How’s your spirit? Are you uptight or anxious?


• Are you serving the Lord with gladness?


• Is your heart tender and responsive to the Lord?


• How are your spiritual and emotional gauges? What are you doing to refill them?


• Are there any areas that you have been teaching or sharing something that you’re not living?


• Is there anything that you’ve been doing or not doing that you would not want others to know?


• Are there any areas of your life that you are not obeying what you know God wants you to do?


• Is there anything you need to repent of?


• Has the pace of your life outraced the love of your life?

A Community of Christian Friends

“I Did It My Way”

Hiking is exhilarating. I love choosing the tallest mountain, picking the toughest trail, and scaling my way to the highest point. Mighty conqueror, I pause at the peak, recapture my breath, drink in the view, and throw both arms high in the air in a triumphant pose. Yes! I did it and I did it all by myself.

This is a great attitude for hiking but it sure gets me in trouble everywhere else. Surrounded by the sound waves of American self-sufficiency I all too easily hum Frank Sinatra’s old classic, “I Did It My Way.”

This is completely contrary to God’s design!

God Has a Different Way

Instead of isolated islands, God placed us in families, in relationships, in churches, and in community. He extols the virtues of sharing, submission, and sacrifice. He is right.

That’s why I was so thankful Thursday to restart the summer rhythm of meeting with my accountability group. It is a simple gathering born out of sheer desperation. Years ago, fearing my self-sufficient nature, I approached a handful of godly, gracious women. Women who would love me, support me, teach me, and keep me in line. I invited them into my world and eventually into my heart. They are my dear friends and more.

I’ll Do It His Way

So, as the calendar turned over to summer we began to meet again. Ninety simple minutes of getting reacquainted and reconnected - with each other, our goals, our callings, and our overwhelming love for Jesus. These women make the gospel come alive. They restore my sense of spiritual community and their authentic lives open my heart wider to the love of God.

Solo hiking may be an exhilarating afternoon excursion, but it is only in community that I experience real, daily Christian living. Thank you dear friends, for all that you are and do in my life. I am humbled by the privilege of walking this journey with you.

To the Graduate - An Open Letter to My Son

We smiled. Really, it was all that your father and I could do the first time we saw you. We just smiled. You were so precious, so tiny, so vulnerable, and best of all you were ours!

That first year flew by so quickly. You slept, you burped, you laughed, and you made us all smile. I have never seen a better baby in my whole life – at least until your feet hit the floor. Look out world. You crawled, you climbed, you scampered, and you escaped my tender grasp time and time again. But you never escaped my heart.

Your proud foray into the world of academia soon followed when at the age of two you stepped out of my car and into Hope Preschool. The world gasped but welcomed this delightful class clown with the beguiling eyes, and your ability to make others smile just grew and grew. And so did you. From Hope, to Calvary, to Grace Lutheran, Geneva, and then home again, the literal and academic years have sprouted wings and flown.

I have loved watching you go and grow, pure energy wrapped in skin. An accomplished drummer, a faithful student and a star athlete, our hearts nearly burst with pride. With incredible agility, you have tapped out a tune, graced the soccer fields, led the football team, and mastered the art of Tae Kwon Do. We have loved every minute of watching, listening, cheering, and screaming your name. You are truly amazing.

And now our baby boy has grown into a mature and wonderful man. Kind, compassionate, intense, and determined, you still make me smile. I love you with all my heart, dear son. And on this, your high school graduation day, I lift my eyes toward heaven above and thank our Father for the day He chose to make you ours.

Congratulations – and look out world, he’s only just begun!